Monsters

Monsters don't sleep under your bed
They sleep in your head
Because self destruction is such a pretty little thing
And sometimes you wish you were dead

Sorry

I'm sorry that I was never good enough for you
No matter what I did you never were happy with me
It seemed like everything I did made you mad, upset, or disappointed in me
But you would always tell me that you would never leave me
But I guess you lied about that
So mascara is running down my face because my heart is falling out of place because you left me
So I'm going to paint a picture with my razor
The paint is my blood
The canvas is my wrist
I know you probably won't even notice that I'm gone
But I just wanted you to know
That I Have Always Loved You

5/12/12

Slit my wrist and overdose
As I lie here and think
That I’m not good enough
Because that’s what everyone tells me
I’m worthless and just a waste of space
So now I decide to die tonight to see
If they care or if the even notice
So tonight I paint a picture
I paint it with my razor
The paint my blood
The canvas my wrist

My New Best Friend

I think that my Razor is my new bestfriend
It's the only thing that doesn't judge me
It let's me do whatever I want and it doesn't complain
It's always here for me when I need it
I know it will never hold a grudge against me
It will never ever get mad at me because of something I did
It will never argue with me
I know that it will never leave me and
I know it will always love me

Now I thinks it's time for my new bestfriend to meet my leg... Oh wait.. I forgot... It already has...

I think I like my new bestfriend

Silent Tears

Silent Tears are always the worst tears

They are the ones that hurt the most because they mean the most

But you don't want anyone to know that you're crying

They are the ones that you cry when you really care about someone

Life

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more.

You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you.

Secrets

They say Two can keep a Secret if One is Dead
But you know how hard it is to keep a secret if both of those people are still alive
I know that is very very hard to do because you are constantly bombarded with that secret  when you see that other person
It gets really hard to keep that secret
It presses down on all sides of you threatening your very livelihood

Cry

You sit at home alone and cry yourself to sleep
Wondering why you opened your heart like that
Because you know your heart was going to be broken
Because it has happened before
You try and call him everyday but he doesn't return your calls
You see him everyday at school

Letters

Hate has four letters, So does Love...

Enemies has seven, So does Friends...

Lying has five, So does Truth...

Hurt has four, So does Heal

1/28/12

Don't tell me you haven't run that blades across your wrist
Praying for the courage to press down a little harder
But now I guess you're at that point
Where hurting yourself on the outside
Doesn't help with the pain on the inside

8/2/10

Everybody thinks that I'm a happy-go-lucky person
But I'm really not that type of person
I know how to act to make people happy
I know what to do so that I don't get into trouble
I'm crying on the outside

ANGER

Anger controls every aspect of your mind, body, and soul

Anger is a very strong emotion

There are many forms of Anger depending on what type of person you are

TO-GET-HER

If you want to be TOGETHER
You have TO-GET- HER

Truth

Mascara ran down her face
As her heart fell out off place
Because she knows the worst thing about being lied to is she wasn't worth the truth

9/9/11

Pain anger rage hate hurt insecurities unloved bitterness cold resentful harmful suicide addiction rejection resentment aloneness despised unforgiveness bottled up emotions stress scared lies

Everyday i wake up with a fake smile just to please everybody
Everynight i go to bed and cry because i know no one will understand
Day by day i live as if nothing is wrong
Night by night i know nothing is right
I'm living a lie i dont belong here
I cant go on living like this
I just want this pain to go away
Why wont the pain STOP
My arms show how much nothing is right in my life
But i know no one sees them becasue i know how to hide it well

8-12-11

This is my cry for help
I'm on my hands and knees begging you to stay
This is my plea to you
I'm waging this battle within myself and I need your help
Oh why won't you stay?
Just hear me out one last time
Whenever I needed you, you were always there
Now that I need you more than ever you are nowhere to be found
You’re leaving me broken and bruised
You’re leaving me to fight this battle myself
I don’t know how much more of this I can take
This is my cry for help
I can’t hold on much longer

You Don't Know The Pain I Have

You don't know the pain you caused me to have
You don't know the sadness I feel or the pain I have to live with
You don't know the sadness I feel
I lie awake at night wondering if we could've been
But I always think no like you said
Maybe someday we will meet again
Maybe this time will be better than the first
For now I just wonder why I have pain, hurt, and sadness
When we meet again I hope it's pleasant
You don't know the pain I have

Thanks To You!

I feel no pain because you cased me to resist pain
Thanks to you i don't feel loved by anyone
You were the one who caused me to be this way and thanks to you I feel alone
Maybe if you hadn't left me I would feel pain and I wouldn't feel unloved
Because of you I feel no pain!
All I feel is anger and hate
All I feel is rejection and fear
Thanks to you
That's all I feel

Why Do We Have People We Don't Want & Want People We Can't Have

Love is a simile for wanting someone
True Love a word meaning praising some one as a god and with the sacrifice of their life
Over time people try to achieve true love but were never satisfied
Why is it we can never be with those that we love
But are with the ones that love us
Love is confusing because it fades
It must be nurtured by hate and likeness
Love is sad because it never works
It always lets you down
Nothing is ever right
It never gets anywhere
Love is a intangible object

Confusion

Confusion controls the mind, body, and soul
It meditates in the mind like a growing tumor
A tumor that won't stop growing
It takes control of your heart
Do you love or hate the one
You once gave your heart to
Your heart is saying you love him
But your mind is saying you hate him
Confusion won't let u choose
Confusion is what you deal with in the life of Love

Love and Hate

Love and Hate are the equals of life
Light and Darkness the equals of power
Whoever said Love is everlasting was wrong
Love has a time frame invisible to all
A time that's unimaginable it's so real
Love is distorted and cruel it has no true reason
No one understands Love but I do
It's an equation that lasts for seconds
Love is a minute but Hate is an hour